A pig does not always receive the best publicity. This pig wishes to tell the world about all the wonderful things in a pig’s life, including such cultural pursuits as attending a showing of HAMLET.
A PIGTAIL
I make no excuse for my family, we’re pigs,
We are quite used to those who poke fun and make digs.
They say we speak ‘swine’ and some French – oui, oui, oui!
But that’s only when running for home, don’t you see?
When we play footy, we are ‘hogging’ the ball,
While we rest in a ‘hammock’. Oh, what a gall!
We use ‘oinkment’ for ‘rashers’; a ‘pig-pen’ to write;
Pull ‘hamstrings’; go ‘hog-wild’; ‘pork chop’ when we fight.
No one will trust us, they say we all ‘squeal’,
And folk wrap us in ‘blankets’ for their favourite meal.
Travelling on planes means that now ‘pigs can fly’,
At parties, we ‘ham it up’, they can’t say we’re shy.
They complain we are ‘boars’, but I must set that right.
We are cultured, please join us for ‘HAMLET’ tonight?
