Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary is being her contrary best. The videographer wishes to do an interview with her about her prize winning garden, but she is is no mood to answer his/her questions. Instead she slyly manages to put the interviewer off. A humorous, intermediate duologue.
MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY
(INTERMEDIATE DUOLOGUE)
Michele Lourie c 2015
(Videographer can be either boy or girl)
(Mary enters, followed by videographer who is obviously chasing her for an interview)
MARY: You should speak to my manager. I don’t answer questions without
my manager’s say-so.
VIDEOGRAPHER: (in a wheedling tone)
But I only want to ask one question – just one little question, please.
MARY: If it’s about my garden, well, I have a contract with GARDENING
TODAY and they are very particular about my answering questions
from any rival gardening programs.
VIDEOGRAPHER: But this is not a gardening program, this is the LIFESTYLE TODAY program, and we are interested in the person behind the
important news of the day, and you are very important in the
‘gardening’ world.
MARY: (looking flattered)
Okay then, just one question.
VIDEOGRAPHER: (hurriedly puts the camera in a position to film)
Right, on the count of three. One… two…. three.
(during the three counts Mary has been fixing her hair and dress)
Miss Mary Quite Contrary, our viewers are very anxious to know –
how does your garden grow?
MARY: (angrily) CUT!
(Videographer lowers camera and looks embarrassed)
That question has been asked of me over and over again and,
frankly, I’m sick of hearing it. How my garden grows is a secret,
and I have to protect my rights.
VIDEOGRAPHER: But couldn’t you give just a small hint? Other interviewees have
been very helpful. ‘Mary had a little lamb’ told us about the
problems she had taking her lamb to school, and ‘Georgie, Porgie
Puddin’ and Pie’ gave us the inside story of the scandal when he
kissed the girls and made them cry. It would be very sad if we
couldn’t get some statement from you.
MARY: (has a calculating expression)
Very well. I’ll give you a statement.
VIDEOGRAPHER: Great, thank you, thank you so much. Ready.. one … two …three.
(Gets ready to film, while Mary again fixes her hair and dress)
VIDEOGRAPHER: Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary, how does your garden grow?
MARY: With big green peas and leafy beans and spinach all in a row.
VIDEOGRAPHER: Really, is that all? I thought you grew something different, something unique. Oh well, there goes my exclusive.
(Videographer exits shaking head)
MARY: (facing audience)
Actually …. my garden grows ….
With silver bells and cockle shells and little maids all in a row.
But I wasn’t going to tell him/her that.
(pauses and gives a cheeky grin)
Well you know, I am quite contrary!
