ARE WE THERE YET
Michele Lourie
(The actors play a hand/finger game)
ACTOR 1: Let’s play something else. How about ‘I Spy’?
ACTOR 2: O.K. I spy with my little eye something coloured ‘blue’.
ACTOR 1: The flower on Mum’s dress.
ACTOR 2: Nope!
ACTOR 1: The stripes in Dad’s tie?
ACTOR 2: No. Give up?
ACTOR 1: Yeah, I give up.
ACTOR 2: The sky.
ACTOR 1: You can’t have the sky – the sky isn’t inside the car.
ACTOR 2: So what. I can still spy it.
ACTOR 1: That’s cheating. You’re a cheater.
ACTOR 2: Am not!
ACTOR 1: Are so!
ACTOR 2: Am not!
ACTOR 1: Are so!
(Pause as they both look out the windows)
TOGETHER: Are we there yet?
ACTOR 1: (mumbling) Only asking.
Don’t put your foot on my side.
ACTOR 2: Who made you the boss of the seat?
ACTOR 1: Just keep to your side.
ACTOR 2: Touch, touch, touch. (Touches with foot)
ACTOR 1: Stop it! If you don’t stop, I’m telling Mum.
ACTOR 2: Cry baby, big baby!
ACTOR 1: (goes to call out) Mmmmm!
ACTOR 2: O.K., O.K., I’ll stop.
(Pause as they both look out the windows) (Actor 2 points across Actor 1)
ACTOR 1: Hey look – did you see that?
ACTOR 2: What, what did you see?
ACTOR 1: A cheetah – with spots all over it.
ACTOR 2: Stop it. There are no cheetahs in Australia.
ACTOR 1: Are so!
ACTOR 2: Are not!
ACTOR 1: Are so – in the Zoo. And one spotty one sitting right next to me.
ACTOR 2: Not fair!
(Pause as they look out the windows)
TOGETHER: Are we there yet?
ACTOR 1: I need a drink of water.
ACTOR 2: Use your water bottle.
ACTOR 1: I forgot to bring it. Can I have some out of yours?
ACTOR 2: No!
ACTOR 1: Oh come on, please
ACTOR 2: No, I don’t want your mouth drinking out of my bottle.
ACTOR 1: You’re so mean!
(Pause as they look out the windows)
TOGETHER: Are we there yet?
ACTOR 1: I feel sick.
ACTOR 2: Well just don’t be sick over me.
ACTOR 1: Will if I want to!
ACTOR 2: Will not!
ACTOR 1: Will so!
ACTOR 2: (Starts to call out) Mmmmmm
ACTOR 1: Alright, don’t tell Mum.
(pause)
TOGETHER: What, we’re there already?
ACTOR 1: Well that was lots of fun.
ACTOR 2: Yeah.
(They hi-five)
